You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
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