He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
So vagazzling was a success
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
