Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
I don't think brook has ever known best
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Randomize
