I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
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