You can't special order awesome
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
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