pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Randomize
