we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Randomize
