yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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