Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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