my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
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