You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Randomize