I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize