FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
he just fucked me for my cheese.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
