She said her name was "party"
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
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