Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
Randomize
