Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Randomize
