I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
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