Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Randomize
