no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Randomize
