Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
