I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
