i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
Randomize
