god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
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