Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize
