So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
Randomize
