Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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