Michael Bay diarrhea
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
Randomize