So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
