new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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