Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
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