no you cant smoke seaweed
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Randomize
