Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
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