Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Randomize
