Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
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