Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
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