is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
Holy shit dude........stairs
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
Randomize
