At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
My life is pants optional.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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