ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
