I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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