I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
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