So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
haha omg you stole $185 from a passed out drunk indian on your porch and called the ambulance??
savin' lives aint cheap
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
I would ride that face into the sunset
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
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