it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
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