My friends, they love my intelligence
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize
