Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Randomize
