i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Randomize