with your own penis?
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
