i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
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