roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize