don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
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