man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
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