i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
Randomize
